NOAA Agrees to Drop Motherfu**ker
From List of 2008 Hurricane Names

July 1st, 2008 | Most Viewed, News, Post K

MIAMI, Florida — Amidst a violent, clockwise swirling maelstrom of controversy, the National Weather Service and National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration (NOAA) have agreed to remove a controversial name from this year’s list of storms.

Regardless of of how many storms form in the Atlantic and the Gulf this year, there will be no Hurricane Motherfu**er.

“There just wasn’t a good reception for this particular name on this year’s list,” said NOAA spokesman Gunther Goodwood. “To say we were surprised is an understatement.”

But fifth grade teacher Gloria Ard said the NOAA should have been able to predict this storm.

“We get those tracking maps every year and follow storms with students. How are we supposed to talk to students about a hurricane named Motherfu**er? How does that possibly go in the Wednesday Weekly newsletter?”

Some local meteorologists, however, have sided with the NOAA.

Bob Flash of www.nolasflashweathernowbam!.com actually liked the idea of a Cat 4 Motherfu**er bearing down on the city.

“The names have always been lame, especially now that they’re trying to be all PC and multicultural and crap,” said Flash. “What we need is something that really gets people’s attention and conveys a sense of urgency and danger.”

“If your neighbor’s got his house boarded up and he’s spraypainting ‘Come and get some, Motherfu**er!’ across the front, aren’t you going to think about boarding up and getting your kids out of town?”

Cynthia Thoms of the Mayor’s Office of Preparedness said in a prepared statement:

“Of course the Mayor wants all residents to be vigilant, but we also want to be sensitive and maybe even a little bit classy. Dare I say ’sophisticated?’”

Meterologist Flash insists that he will continue to fight for reinstatement of the name in the coming years. ”

We missed a real chance to get people’s attention here,” said Flash. “That’s the real motherfu**er of it all.”