“Celebration in the Oaks” to be Re-renamed

Editors’ Note: This article originally appeared in Where Y’at Magazine.

Since so many of City Park’s austere, ancient Mossy Oaks have gone the way of the woodchipper since Katrina, a blue-ribbon panel has been established to aid City park officials in brainstorming a new name for “Celebration in the Oaks.”

Austue citizens may recall this is not the first name change of the annual non-denominational festival formerly known as “Christmas in the Oaks.”

Except this time the problem isn’t Christmas. It’s The Oaks.

The panel, co-chaired by media mogul Clancy DuBois and owner of local instiution Fat Harry’s Dickie Unangst, has submitted the following names for public comment in advance of a community meeting to be held in the next few weeks:

Celebration in the Newly Planted, Fast Growing Palms
Celebration in the Lawn
Celebration in the Shrubbery
Celebration in the Monkey Grass
Celebration in the Cellphone Towers
Celebration in the Birch
Celebration in the Beech
Celebration in the Bee-yotch
Celebration in the Christmas Lights
And simply…Celebration Station!

Regardless of the name, City Park officials promise that “Celebration in the ____________” will be just as illumination as ever.

“Katrina took away our trees,” said one anonymous City Park employee, but she could never take our festive blue Sea Dragon down by Christian Brothers.”