Thousands Desperate To Know
Where They “Got They Shoes”

Hurricane Katrina evacuees face a different world. Gone are the jobs; the houses; even the certainty of three hot meals a day; and as thousands poured into the Houston Astrodome, Red Cross volunteers became overwhelmed with the onslaught of evacuees demanding to know where they “got they shoes.”

“It’s true that many evacuees had their shoes ruined as they trampled through waist deep water,” said one volunteer.

“But we here at the Red Cross simply did not anticipate this level of desperation in regards to foot attire.”

“Once their necessities were met, the evacuees kept demanding of us, ‘Tell me where I got my shoes.’ I would just try to reassure them that although they lost their footwear in the storm, we would do everything in our power to see to it that they received adequate replacements. But this never seems to appease them. They walk off giving us disgruntled stares.”

“These people don’t get it,” complained Franklin Jackson of Orleans Parish. “They look at us like we’re crazy. We’re just trying to hold on to a bit a home.”

Just days before the evacuees were relocated to other shelters due to Hurricane Rita, both Reebok and Nike each donated two truckloads of new footwear to the dome.

“I was just expecting them to say ‘on my feet,’” explained Jackson as he tested out his new clothing, “but now that I got me these Reebok AVR’s, I’m planning on starting a group to demand where we got our shirts, our drawers, our ipod, and our bottomless strippers. Let’s see what they do with that.”

Red Cross workers in Arkansas where Mr. Jackson was relocated to have yet to comment on his group’s requests.