Vitter Issues Formal Request to “Stop Snitchin”

Sen. David Vitter (R-La.) broke his silence today, issuing his formal statement since the recent exposure of his philandering ways by self-proclaimed Hustler Larry Flynt.

In his statement, Vitter said: “Those ho’s better stop snitching.”

He added that Flynt was a “hater,” who “needed to let a player play.”

In a recent 60 minutes report, Anderson Cooper reported a link between hip-hop’s acceptance of a “Stop Snitchin’” policy discouraging eyewitness informants and inner city crime.

Anderson, reached by the C-T for a special phone interview, explained that he couldn’t see exactly where Vitter was coming from.

“In a city such as New Orleans, where crime and lack of witnesses is such a problem, a Senator who openly adopts this policy creates a dangerous situation.

“District Attorney Eddie Jordan feels Cooper’s fears are unfounded.

“I know we may have had to let a case slide or two because of we couldn’t find a witness on the court day or the lack of snitching or, sometimes, I just felt like taking a day off.”

“But this ‘Snitching’ thing may just be turning around with the Vitter case.”

Jordan noted that D.A.’s office has been overwhelmed and that his associates are putting in extended hours due to the informants against Vitter.

“I got Hos from Washington, Hos from Canal St., Hos from Marrero. Ho, Ho, Ho…lined up around the block ready to start the snitchin’ on Vitter.”

Jordan felt that this could mark a turning point in the City’s conviction rates and that to mark the occasion he would be officially retiring his derby hat.”

“It was about time to take a more professional approach,” Jordan said.

“And on top of it, with the all those prostitutes against Sen. Vitter around the offices, well, I was starting to look like a pimp.”