SDT to Offer Alternative to “Disney-Like” Clean

CITY HALL — The overall cleanliness of The Quarter has become the latest political football in the budget battle between The Mayor and The Council.

Mayor Nagin argues that there’s fat to be trimmed in the city sanitation budget. The City Council aims to maintain the “Disney-like” cleaning that has won raves from locals and visitors since it debuted two years ago.

The sanitation contractor, SDT Waste & Debris Services has not been fired. But operations will certainly be scaled back.

Sidney Torres IV, the glamorous president of SDT, isn’t concerned about “how this smells.”

“Look, Mayor Nagin and I are both famous, so we are gonna work this out. That’s what famous people do,” said Mr. Torres through his publicist.

Torres went on to describe a new cleaning strategy.

“My executives and I have been meeting every afternoon to discuss our plan. Though we’ve spent millions in mechanical equipment to provide the Quarter with a “Disney” package, we are just about ready to present a new compromise package that we hope is acceptable to C. Ray and the Council.”

“I call it: A Jazzland-like clean,” he added.

“Government’s gonna love it, and the people who live in and visit the quarter are gonna love it too. It has a more New Orleans feel. For example, we’ll pick up the Hand Grenade bottles, but drop the lemon-spray.”

“The way I grew up, Bourbon Street is supposed to smell like piss and shame,” said Torres. “We want to bring some of that back.”

Torres will present his proposal to the Mayor’s office and the City Council on Wednesday via satellite hookup from the Kid Rock compound in Hollywood.